Are you looking for inspiration, information, or a belly laugh? We’ve got the ultimate stoner sayings to amplify your high. Grab some buds grown from some popular strain explore our seed bank, and enjoy our selection of exciting reads.
These quotes cheer you up, get you thinking, and may even teach you something new.
Funny Quotes
“Is that a joint? That there looks like a quarter-pounder.”
– Cheech and Chong
There isn’t a more iconic stoner duo than Cheech and Chong, and this extract is one of their most relatable sayings. If you need funny marijuana quotes, these two famous stoners hit the spot. Most cannabis lovers know the feeling of needing a joint bigger than a quarter-pounder.
“I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.”
– Mitch Hedberg
This American comedian is known for his iconic one-liners and deadpan delivery. Hedberg is all about short, awkward humor and lots of non-sequiturs. This phrase is one of those high sayings you’ll likely see hanging on the wall in a stoner’s dorm room.
“I got high and forgot I wasn’t supposed to get high.”
– Ricky Williams
This former NFL player is no stranger to cannabis use. Williams has been candid about enjoying weed and believes it offers numerous benefits for athletes. The NFL suspended him for violating its policy on substance abuse.
In an interview on USA Today’s “Sports Seriously,” Williams mentioned how he once ate from a tray of “brownies” immediately after a game. This quote is hilarious, considering his history in the NFL.
Educational Quotes
“I don’t think [pot] is more dangerous than alcohol.”
– Barack Obama
This profound quote can be taken literally and has a deeper meaning. For years, cannabis was viewed negatively and has only recently been legalized in some states.
There haven’t been any fatal overdoses or deaths directly linked to weed, yet alcohol is said to kill more than 140,000 people in the US every year. This quote resonates with the ex-president’s history with marijuana.
Obama was candid about his weed use and compared it to smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol. He views it in the same light as other legal substances people enjoy but also points out that cannabis isn’t as dangerous.
“That is not a drug; it’s a leaf.”
– Arnold Schwarzenegger
In an interview with GQ magazine, the interviewer asked about Schwarzeneggers’ substance use, pointing out footage of the star smoking a joint. The Hollywood actor turned governor of California explained that he didn’t see cannabis as a narcotic.
Schwarzenegger jokingly said that pumping iron was his drug, not marijuana. He also exclaimed it was something everyone in the 70s did, pointing out the need to remove stereotypes surrounding cannabis.
“I should’ve smoked my whole career. I should’ve smoked when fighting because it put me in this different state of mind.”
– Mike Tyson
This extract is one of those stoner quotes that make you think. It challenges the belief that people who smoke weed are lazy and unsuccessful.
Tyson credits cannabis for helping him find peace and become a better fighter. If you need some motivation to be a productive stoner, Mike Tyson could make an excellent role model.
“Stop killing each other, man. Let’s smoke a blunt.”
– Tupac
The “Dear Mama” rapper preached non-violence and smoking fatties. This extract resonates with the peaceful stoners who want everyone to be happy and high.
The socially aware artist wanted nothing more than to educate the world and break stereotypes. If everyone smoked a joint, perhaps the world would be more peaceful. This quote speaks to the fragility of life and our ability to choose good over evil.
Spiritual Quotes
“Smoking helped put me in touch with the realm of the senses.”
– Hugh Hefner
If you’ve ever smoked a joint, you know that weed can heighten your senses. Things taste better, your body feels relaxed, and your mind is more focused.
This stoner saying also speaks to artists who use cannabis for focus and creativity. By relieving racing thoughts and overthinking, weed can help you get in touch with your senses and explore the depths of your imagination.
“When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.”
– Bob Marley
Arguably one of the most famous stoners, Bob Marley, viewed cannabis as a sacred herb. He believed it helped people heal and become more in tune with themselves.
Marijuana may create a sense of deep concentration, resulting in reflective thinking. Some religions use weed as an entheogen, believing it clears mental blockages and allows you to be your true self.
You could also take this quote about smoking weed down a deeper path and say that cannabis makes you more self-aware. Through reflection, it may bring your flaws to the surface, allowing you to better yourself.
“Some of my finest hours have been spent on my back porch, smoking weed and observing as far as my eye can see.”
– Thomas Jefferson
At first glance, this statement doesn’t seem deep or spiritual, but if you reread it, you may find the true meaning. Here are some possibilities:
- Sometimes we forget the beauty of simple things like smoking a joint and enjoying the view.
- A few puffs can slow time, allowing you to take a step back and enjoy life’s beauty.
- Stoner quotes about life like this one fill us with gratitude.
Inhale. Exhale. We all need time to be alone with our thoughts and enjoy the peace of simplicity. Cannabis may calm anxiety and enable you to silence your mind.
There’s a lot of controversy over whether Thomas Jefferson made this statement. There’s no record of whether the founding fathers sampled their produce, but many experts think they did. Irrespective of who said it, it’s a super relatable famous saying.
“Smoke the marijuana and get high. Stay above the wicked and fly.”
-Snoop Dogg
We leave you with this extract by the OG of marijuana, Snoop Dogg, and creator of many trendy stoner quotes and sayings. If you read our articles, you know we’re all about positivity, and this statement sums up the good vibes we’re trying to spread.
If you’re smoking right now, here’s to you staying above negativity and building habits for success. Cheers.