I hate my life. Have you told yourself this repeatedly? Maybe no one knows it! Your family and close friends think you are living your best life. Life moves fast, and one day, you realize that you are not where you thought you would be. It can leave you feeling a bit pathetic.

You were sure that by the time you were a certain age, you would be driving a sports car and living the good life. The first thing you need to know is that you are far from alone in this feeling.  I want to reassure you to keep walking your path no matter how much you want to give in. It's possible to turn "I hate my life" into something much better. Once you understand goal setting for success, it will give your life new direction and purpose. 

Life tends to hand everything over to the person who knows what they want. Those who wake up daily with a purpose, go and meet that goal. There is nothing else to it. When things are hard, the best thing you can do is stay focused on what it is you have always wanted.

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I Hate My Life Because of Unrealistic Expectations

Unrealistic expectations are the culprits when it comes to not being as far in life as you thought. You grew up in the era of the 25-year-old billionaires. Watching movies like "The Social Network" leave you feeling like you can have it all before you turn 30.

The truth is that you're not him, and your stories is different. Most successful entrepreneurs don't hit their stride until about age 40. History has proven over and over again, that success requires time. It requires rolling up your sleeves and being unknown for quite some time.

I Hate My Life Because My Parents Said I Was Special 

You also grew up in a fantasy land with parents telling you that you can be anything. The truth is that you cannot be anything. You can cultivate your natural gifting and be exceptional in a few areas.

The problem with being told you can do anything is that it almost always leaves out the time factor. A baby takes nine months to make, and you can't speed that up with more sex, or by getting nine different women pregnant. Regardless of what you do, that baby needs nine months to be ready.

Your dreams work the same. They need time and a lot of other ingredients to be ready. If you rush it, you risk blowing up the whole operation. If a baby is born premature, there are often complications that can result in death. You have to be willing to allow things to take the time they need to work.

I Hate My Life Because of  Social Media Lies

Now you can go on LinkedIn and see where all your friends work. You can see their vacations and perfect marriages on Instagram. Pinterest shows you all the things your friends desire. None of this paints a picture of reality. There is a genuine reason social media accounts do not connect to our banks. Numbers don't lie; people do!

You have to learn to use social media for what it is. It's people trying to put their best foot forward. Many will only put up the perfect photo of the 55 they took of themselves. There is much more going on, and everyone is struggling in some way.

I hate my life because I don't See All That I have.

In the Habit Stacker app, six days a week, we ask the same question to users. That question is, "What are you grateful for today." Sometimes people get bored with these questions, and I think this highlights a significant problem. You always have something to be thankful for no matter how bad life is.

How to Turn Things Around

Be a Bit Tougher Than The Problem

We have more resources and conversations about mental health now than ever before. That is a good thing! Where issues arise is that we forget that sometimes life calls for toughness. You have to be a bit tougher than the situation you are going through. It's not popular advice in modern society, but it's good advice.

When life throws anything at you, someone else is getting worse thrown at them. Not only do some last, but they find a way to thrive through hard times. Nothing good or bad lasts forever. If you can be tougher, the challenge will always back down in time. You may be screaming, "I hate my life!" today. Tomorrow is a new day, and it can bring a new situation.

Focus On What Over Why

You need to ask more what questions compared to asking why questions. Let's say that you lose your job, don't ask why did this happen to me because it will get you nowhere. It will send you in a thinking loop that leads to nothing.

When you ask what questions, it starts to change everything. Then you ask yourself questions like, what should I do next? What could I have done better? These questions will improve your life! What can I do to make sure this never happens to me again? What leads to actions, whereas why leads to self-pity and loathing.

You will never get your life on track if you are not moving forward. You need to take tangible steps forward to get what you want out of life. What forces you to keep finding that next step and in what direction it should be.

The Power of Cumulative Knowledge

Never underestimate the power of cumulative knowledge. The biggest problem with being 20 is that you are brave and ready to conquer the world. The problem is that you only have 20 years of collective expertise. When you are 40, you have more than double because it's exponential. Goal setting for success means having patience as you wait for this cumulative power to add up. 

This Things Exponentially Add Up:

Relationships

Lessons from failures

Lessons from success

Experiences

Perspectives

Courses

Books read

Mentors

and so much more

The knowledge starts to build on itself. As the years go by, you get stronger mentally due to the cumulative experience. Knowing this, you should focus your time on getting as much of it as you can, and the results will come later. You need to read more books, find more mentors, take more courses to keep learning. These things never go to waste. They keep adding up and building until you have something extraordinary.

Stay Definitive in What You Want

More times than not, people can be very wishy-washy with what they want from life. One day you want this, the next day you want something else, and things are always changing. It's hard to attain anything when it changes all the time. 

Life tends to hand everything over to the person who knows what they want. Those who wake up daily with a purpose, go and meet that goal. There is nothing else to it.

The person who is not sure with what they want goes on to do only a little because they have no direction or purpose. When things are hard, the best thing you can do is stay focused on what it is you have always wanted.

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Ian Warner

About the author

I went from a broken leg to a 2012 Olympian. I have spent the last 15 years building positive habits as a track athlete and entrepreneur. I founded Habit Stacker and dedicated my life to helping people to develop winning habits. I have helped over 5,000 people...

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