No one makes good choices when burning with anger inside. Its an emotion you will experience many times in your life, but the consequences of not being able to handle it can be devastating. There are good people today sitting in prison cells due to choices they made strictly out of anger. Some words can never be taken back that were spoken because of this emotion. You have to learn how to let go of anger before it gets the best of you.
The key to letting go of anger is not denying it or acting like it does not exist. Instead, you must give it time to express itself and be what it is and then follow some natural progressions. Some people can let go of anger quicker because they have found healthy ways to release anger. That is what the second part of this article will focus on.
What You Will Learn
If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. Chinese Proverb
The Dangers of Anger
There are both physical dangers to a lot of anger, as well as emotional danger, and they both need to be considered.
On the health side, anger can cause stress, high blood pressure, heart disease, and even hypertension. When you look at what stress can do to your body, the effects are devastating over the long run. The worst thing you can do is be stressed out for an extended period of time.
Emotionally anger can make you engage in behaviors that you would not regularly. It can ultimately impair your decision making and logic. When your logical thinking is gone, you can say or do things that you will soon regret once the anger subsides.
The other severe emotional danger is due to the memories that stem from anger. The smallest things can then trigger you and ignite that flame of anger once again, even though the situation is long in the past.
Stages of Anger
- Anger
- Eye for an Eye
- Resentment
- Landing
- Logical Thinking
- Resolution
- Release
Anger
The emotion of anger is often just thrust open you when you least expect it. All you feel is rage inside and all you want to do is physically react to it. Even if anger is justified, it takes you mentally out of a place to make proper decisions.
Eye for An Eye
You know you're angry when the only thing you can think about is how you want to hurt someone back. You feel like someone has made you angry and you would be justified to return the favor or even do worse.
Resentment
After wanting to retaliate you quickly realize that you can't stand the person that harmed you. You may not stay here very long though because you eventually realize that there is no point in living in resentment.
Landing
You eventually begin to level off and get your mind and feet back under you. You're not calm yet but you're aware that you are way too triggered to take any action.
Logical Thinking
Finally, your logical mind comes back into your body and you can start to think through the details of the situation. Its when this happens that the door to forgiveness opens up. When you think logically you remember the character of the person who harmed you and that you too have hurt others in the past.
Response
You eventually choose how you want to respond to the anger. The answers to that will be reveal later. These items help you to actually let go of your anger in a healthy way. If the response comes before the return of logical thinking, it will often be one out of emotion.
Release of The Anger
Finally, after taking the appropriate action at the right time, you realize that you can finally move on from the anger. You finally regain a sense of peace within yourself.
Healthy Ways to Release Anger
1. Get to The Root of The Problem
The best thing you can do when trying to let go of anger is to understand what it's stemming from. The emotion of anger is just a result of your reaction to something, but another person could be in the same position and react in a different. You will never understand the problem until you get to the root of your feelings.
2. Complete a Hard Workout
Nothing can refresh your mind and body like a hard workout because it stresses your mind and body. The angry energy you feel inside, you will be forced to release and leave the more you push yourself. By getting your body moving, you will increase blood flow and help to bring clarity to your thought.
3. Get In The Sauna
The sauna will make you sweat and think. Try and go in alone, where you will be forced to spend time in your thoughts. As you sweat more, visualize the anger you feel releasing with the sweat leaving your body. The sauna will help to relieve all the stress you feel inside of your body.
4. Get a Massage
Anger and stress can create emotional trigger points in your body. This is why sometimes people get certain areas rubbed out, and it can make them emotional. That trigger point that was created in stress can be connected back to past anger.
5. Meditate
Stop and take some time to simply breathe and be alone. It's amazing how powerful deep breathing can be. It can relieve stress, reset you emotionally, and help you find peace within yourself again. This is one of the best tools you can use to calm yourself down in any situation or environment.
6. Take a Hot Shower
For some people, a hot shower is a form of distressing. You come home from a hard day of work, and the only thing you want to do run hot water over your head and lean on the wall. You know those showers! Take the time to step back from the day and take a hot shower if it can help you think better. For some people, the shower is the only place they get enough peace to think.
7. Sleep On It
Its standard advice to not go to sleep angry, and you may have so much on your mind that you can't sleep. Suffering through a tough night can be better than lashing out in anger and having t live with regret. A night of sleep and time to think and calm down can be just what you need to develop a healthy solution.
More Ways to Release Anger
8. Talk It Out Calmly
Sometimes the best way to deal with your anger is to have a conversation with the person who caused you to be angry. Doing this may be one of the hardest to do because it's much easier to talk about them behind their back then to address them face to face. Doing this provides the best opportunity to be heard and clear away all misunderstandings.
9. Find Forgiveness
Anyone who wants to know how to let go of anger will have to walk through forgiveness. You can't walk away from your anger until you are willing to forgive someone for its harm. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting; it means you have had a change in attitude and thinking towards someone who caused you pain. It's not always easy, but it is worth it!
10. Talk to Someone Else
You have to be careful when you are using this as a way to let go of anger. You can always use a good vent session, but it needs to be with the right person. You want to talk to someone who is a good listener and will be truthful with you and not feed your fire. If you talk to your friend who loves drama and gossip, you will leave the conversation worse. You should also not continue having to vent over and over again.
11. Write It Out
A daily journal can be so helpful for letting go of anger or processing any emotions you may have. You could also write a letter or an email that you have no intention of sending. Sometimes you need to get your thoughts out of your head. You have mean and hurtful things you want to say, but you know it would not be justified. Writing provides an avenue to get it off of your chest without destroying another human.
12. Switch Up Your Surroundings
One of the best ways to get out of an angry place is to remove yourself from the location that may cause anger. Maybe it means transferring schools, moving to a new neighborhood, going to a new country, or even small changes like finding a new gym. No move is too drastic to rid your life of anger. Before you make a big move, though, make sure that you are not the problem or else it will follow you everywhere you go.
13. Know Yourself Better
The better you know yourself, the easier it will be to avoid situations that make you angry, and the better you will be able to handle the emotions. You will know what places, people, and types of conversations to avoid so that you don't get mad. When you understand who you are, you can also address the root causes of your extreme emotions.
14. Find The Laughter In Your Life
Laughter is a momentary outpouring of joy. It's difficult to be angry and laughing at the same time. Find your way to laughter, whether that means watching your favorite movie or talking with one of your funny friends. The more you laugh when upset, the smaller the thing causing you to be mad becomes.
15. Cut People Out of Your Life
Be ready to cut a few people out of your life altogether. There may be times when your anger is caused by someone who is malicious and is not sorry for what they have done. Or maybe they want to be better, but they don't know-how. Either way, you need to be ready to cut this person and others out of your life. You can forgive someone but still, decide that its best that you guys go your separate ways.
16. Put it in Perspective
When you are angry, you are very close to the situation and your emotions, and you lose all perspective. Perspective is simply the ability to see things from other's points of view or a different angle. When you want to let go of anger, sometimes you need to step back from it and see things differently.
Conclusion of How to Let Go of Anger
Living in anger is not suitable for your long-term health. The best thing you can do is deal with your pain as quickly as you can. But you must remember that you have to go through the stages of anger. It's not until your logical thinking comes back that you can make a choice that is going to resolve the situation. Everything before that point is about getting yourself to be calm and back to thinking logically as quickly as you can.